Week of Prayer

So, finally, a post about the week of prayer a couple of weeks back.

I was involved in helping organise a week of 24h prayer during Holy week down at my church. Was the first time there had been anything like that really in the church as far as I am aware, although I have a suspicion it may not be the last…. Despite the fact there were a couple of hours when the room itself was not occupied, it ended up being really well used, with quite a few folks coming along once and then coming back again and again throughout the week. One mother dropped in one afternoon with her 3year old daughter, and ended up staying for 2 1/2 hours, the youth group stayed over one night, some of the woman in the church came in every night for 4-6 hours, and various other members of the congregation popped in and out, it ended up being well used by a lot of people from the church. It was amazing to almost feel a greater sense of unity within the church developing over the week as people prayed for each of the many ministry’s that are being run at the moment.

Even by the end of the week there were reports from the pastor saying there was a much greater sense of the presence of God in the ministry training course he was running, the youth group’s open cafe had an amazing time with loads of young folks from the area dropping in and staying and chatting and being prayed for, various prophetic words drawn during the week were released again by different people during the Sunday services and at various times throughout the week the presence of God was so awesome nobody dared speak above a whisper or do anything but tip-toe around! At one point during the week there were 4 guys in the prayer room- all in tears, and at another there were 3 folks rolling around the floor in fits of laughter and joy. We had times of worship each evening; one person with guitar or keyboard, 5 or so people, communion, tears, silence, peace. It was amazing how every evening was different and yet filled with an awe and reverence before the almighty and holy God

This was my first experience of a prayer room that wasn’t just run by and for students, and it was amazing watching a whole church come together and seek God’s face in new and exciting ways. I’m excited to see how it changes the way the church is in the long run, and what other answers to prayer we are still yet to see.

And as a lot of people said during the week, this was just the beginning…

chilled is good :)

I’ve been rediscovering the art of holidays; sleep, eat, chat, 24, eat, chat… it’s beautiful!

Having had one crazy week of prayer the first week of the holidays I have since watched a season of 24, which is still amazing, had dinner with different people nearly every night, travelled home and to Edinburgh to visit family,and generally relaxed. fantastic…

Easter

See His love nailed onto a cross
Perfect and blameless life given as sacrifice
See Him there all in the name of love
Broken yet glorious, all for the sake of us

This is Jesus in His glory
King of Heaven dying for me
It is finished, He has done it
Death is beaten, Heaven beckons me

Greater love no one could ever show
Mercy so undeserved, freedom I should not know
All my sin, all of my hidden shame
Died with Him on the cross, eternity won for us

Tom Lockley

This song seems to have sort of defined Easter for me this year. I was playing in the worship band on Sunday and the power in the music and words nearly blew me away, it was one amazing experience!!!

We had a week of 24h prayer in my church in the run up to Easter (no doubt more on that later) and so I had chance to think a lot more about what it actually means and what it was actually like to be there. I think I can safely say I’ve been once again completely blown away by it all!!! Here are some condensed (apologies for the length, I seem to have thought a lot!) thoughts…

Possibly an obvious one, but what is with the change in the crowds between palm Sunday and the trial? were they different people? did they forget what they had been doing a less than a week earlier? Or is it something we/I still do, praise God with the crowds in church then deny him with the crowds at uni/work/school…

The disciples ask Jesus what sign will signal his return, yet when he gets arrested and crucified they flee in fear. Had they just not fully appreciated the fact that to come back he must also go? or was it that they had never thought he would go like that? despite the sign of Jonah, son of man must be lifted up, son of man will be handed over to the romans etc… do I read scriptures with my own idea of what will happen blocking the truth…?

When Jesus was on the cross, and his hair fell over his face, could he smell the perfume the woman poured over his head a couple of days earlier? did that act of worship remind him of what it was all about when he was abandoned, not only by his friends, but also his Father?

What must Peter have been thinking on Good Friday? How guilty did he feel for denying Christ? Did he think that if he had only stayed and stood up for Jesus, he wouldn’t have died? Jesus had said he was the Messiah hadn’t he, and Messiah’s don’t die like that do they, so did Peter think it was his fault the Messiah had died-had failed? and the fact Jesus foretold it, did that give him any hope? or rather compound his feelings of failure?

And were the disciples very confused? Having watched Jesus swipe the feet from under the pharisees on a number of occasions, why did he stay silent this time? surely if you had to choose a time to stay silent to accusations, in the synagogue would have been better wouldn’t it? risking some humiliation in front of some Jews was surely better than death at the hands of the Romans wasn’t it? Or is that just how I tend to view things, I work out what makes sense and expect that of God, ‘His ways are not our ways…’

Did Peter also feel somehow betrayed? if it wasn’t his fault Jesus had died, what about those 3 years he had given to being a disciple? were they wasted? what would he do now, he wouldn’t even have had a boat to go back to being a fisherman with! I can almost imagine Peter flipping wildly from almost suicidally guilty and depressed, to quite angry, to devastated, and everything in between!!!

Something that really struck me though, was Mark 16:7, and those two words “including Peter”. How amazing is that!!! Jesus knew exactly what Peter was thinking, how he was feeling, and so he specifically made sure the woman told him everything was alright, that Jesus was alive after all. That really gives me such an amazing feeling. Not only did Jesus die for me so that I am made completely whole, but he also makes a point of coming after me when I feel a complete screw up and failure and he takes the time to remind me that it is all alright, his grace is sufficient!!!

This year has been a time when the full ramifications of Easter have hit home with me. I can do nothing. Absolutely Nothing. At all. No good. Nothing. At all. It is finished really means, It Is Finished!!!

and yet from there, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me”. All things. Everything. Nothing can come against me. It is finished really means, It Is Finished!!!

There’s something so liberating about the second idea after really letting the first one sink in. I am free to live life to the full, with fullness of joy, a deep sense of peace, love abounding, unbelievable power, and all because of that cross, and the love that sent him there, all those years ago.

interesting week…

Where you go I’ll go

Think the cartoon and link here pretty much some up a couple of the more interesting moments/chats I’ve had this week.

Something that seems to have come up a lot recently with various people is the merits or not of ordained ministry. I think I’m moving against it more and more. As fantastically shown up above, I think there’s too much of an expectation that the minister should do everything/be everyone. When was the last time you met someone who was amazing and visionary evangelist, as well as being a great pastor and listener. Never mind all the other roles that Paul talks about. What if every church aimed to raise someone up to fill every role mentioned in Paul’s writings? Would it free up churches more to start doing what we’re supposed to be doing and serving and reaching out? Would we see more incredible ministries birthed? Surely the church is the main one missing out by not fulling grasping the opportunities of the various ministries Paul talks about?

And if we did have such a functioning team, maybe then we could look at having an ordained leader overseeing everything and making sure it stays well grounded in scripture, as well as supporting each of the other leaders.

I’m sure there are churches around where the workload is spread across the congregation, and everyone chips in, but I can’t help feeling that there are a lot of churches/christians around who are more than happy to see someone else doing the work instead of everyone getting their hands dirty.

As a mini sort of disclaimer, I am well aware this is by no means a complete overview of the merits or not of ordination, and that I probably haven’t done my own views much justice either. Please feel free to leave comments with your own thoughts, and I may get round to carrying on with my thoughts at some point…not promising anything though!

labels

ned, old codger, young person, lawyer, blonde, catholic, protestant, conservative, charismatic, brethren, pentecostal, presbyterian, christian, non-christian….

A wee sample of the labels I’ve heard people attaching to others recently. No doubt when reading the list you will probably have had your own reaction or thoughts about who it represents, quite possibly both positive and negative. It has sort of struck me recently though how much we as society (myself included) somehow feel justified in writing people off by attaching a label to them.

“typical blonde…”, “old codger, so stuck in their ways…”Since when did an adjective describing one aspect of a person, become a noun, defining whole groups of people in society?

and why should these labels automatically influence how I view people? Are ‘neds’ any less human than ‘christians’? Do ‘old codgers’ have no valid ideas or experiences?

I’ve also been noticing more and more that peculiar habit some Christians have of describing everything as either “christian” or “non-christian”. Does it mean I have to agree with everything that is sung/written/thought because it is “christian”, does that mean it’s not allowed to not be to my taste?

I wonder what would happen if I stopped using labels all together, if I managed to persuade even my subconscious to stop using them. I have a sneaky suspicion that not every lawyer is hard-nosed and not every presbyterian boring or a traditionalist, and I might just find myself discovering a lot of new and interesting points of view. I reckon I will probably start learning an awful lot from a lot more people.

I think I might accept the challenge, shall maybe let you know the outcome in a few weeks…

free rice…

Free rice: play a game, learn new words and feed the world…genius!

love…

I was talking the other night at youth group and what I said and the general debate got me thinking a lot again about what love actually looks like. I’ve been round this topic a few times before, and I’m not convinced I’ll ever be completely satisfied with any conclusions, but here’s a wee glimpse into what I’ve been mulling over… (apologies for the length, hope you’re comfortable with a nice mug of coffee!!!)

Definition of love I found: “Love is giving something of yourself and not needing or expecting anything in return” (Josh Casper). That sums up what I was thinking of at the time, particularly with reference to John 3:16. That has to be the ultimate in giving without needing or expecting in return.

1John pretty much then spends most the book telling us if we don’t love, particularly our brothers and sister in Christ, we “do not know God”, which is fairly blunt. And when Matthew 5 and Jesus telling us to love our enemies is added in to the whole equation it is even more hard hitting!!! so far so standard and not particularly out of the ordinary.

My point was that that included the homeless, the druggies, the alcoholics on the street corner…. all the people your mum would be happier if you walked past… Along with the idea that we should “love until it hurts then love some more” and that we should expect that it will not be easy and we will probably be taken for fools quite often (but hey, they confound the wise ) again so far so standard…

What really challenged me was when we started thinking off that practically. The general reaction was along the lines of, ‘but don’t give money, it only feeds their habit’, ‘be careful, don’t approach them on your own’ and so on. I am aware that people who work with those on the streets always say, don’t give money, it only makes things worse, and it all seems very logical. But is that the problem with it? I’ve never heard of a drug addict/alcoholic kicking the addiction because they were broke, I have however heard of them seeking help because they were shown love. And who gave us (me) the right to dictate to them what they spend their money on? Who are we to judge what they do and where they’re at. Is that not asking to have the tree growing in our eye exposed? And at the end of the day, God gave us Jesus, perfectly aware that we would use him as an excuse for crusades, inquisitions, hatred, racism, and all manner of spectacularly ungodly things. Yet he gave anyway…Jesus healed the 10 lepers, knowing only 1 would say thanks… hmmm….

But at the same time (as a friend pointed out) the 72 were told to shake the dust of their feet at towns that didn’t welcome them and their message (of love?) (Luke 10) and Jesus said don’t give pearls to pigs or waste what is holy on those who are unholy (Mat 7) what does that mean? Is it saying that if the love we show is not accepted we are not to ‘waste’ it on them? is that so unconditional then?

One of the ways round all this, and what I believe is the best I can get to a (semi-) sensible conclusion, is to give practically; food, hot drinks, clothes etc. And to seek God in every situation I encounter and ask Him for discernment on how to act.

But i suppose my issue (finally!!!!) is: Do we, both as a church and as an individual believer, build up this image of who is deserving of our time, money and help, and who isn’t and use that to shape how we react to the folks we meet who, at the end of the day, we are sent out to reach. Do we hide behind our culturally inspired idea of the gospel and those worthy of receiving it, instead of going out and actually living it???

This is my pretty feeble attempt at summing up all the multitude of thoughts that have been passing through my wee head the past couple of days. It is by no means complete, and is something that I believe I will continue to wrestle with for a long time yet!!! Apologies if you feel unfairly lumped in by my excessive use of the plural form, these ideas are something I personally wrestle with and, in my limited experience, others also mull over. Any comments on what others have found when thinking of these ideas welcomed, maybe between us all we can find something that starts looking remotely like the gospel we claim to believe in…

widows

so i spent a few hours this lunchtime entertaining some senior citizens at a lunch at church on me fiddle. Few tunes, bit of a sing-along. Generally very good fun and good chat with some great folks.

Got me thinking as well though. Out of my table of 8 folks, there were 2 other guys and 5 older ladies, 4 of whom were widows. I’m aware that men generally die younger than woman (one theory touted at the table was because the woman nag so much…I’ll leave you to decide ) But it still struck me as a large amount of people if you take general society/church congregations into account. Also puts James 1:27 into perspective…

“Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you”

There’s something about that that is somehow very easy to leave in biblical times. ‘But people live longer now, there’s a better health care and benefits system’ ….

Yet when it really comes down to it, they are still on their own a lot of the time, are generally still frailer than us younger ones, and also have a heap more life experience and interesting stories to tell!!!

I think it’s worth being reminded every now and again that charity actually does begin at home, and that ‘loving our neighbour as ourself’ actually means people right next door as well as everyone else around the globe.

church?

so just to dive in at the deep end…

what is church? or rather, what should church look like?

been thinking about this for a while now, not that I ever really expect to come up with an answer. I think my ideas are changing though…even if quite slowly. A while back I would quite happily have said that buildings, formal teaching and traditional style (ie led, with organ, band whatever else…) worship are not that important, rather the most important part of church was the people, the fellowship, the communion with each other and God. Now I’m not quite sure…

Over the past couple of weeks there have been various instances where the worship at my church has really opened the way into God’s presence, and it’s been unbelievable! I also had a long chat with a friend about how she felt as there was no teaching at a community she has found she didn’t feel able to call it church. I have also been guided to an old, abandoned church, and the only way to describe the place was ‘the place where you are standing was Holy ground’ (ex 3).

It’s all making me think a bit. I’m beginning to think that all these aspects are important (tho I never truly thought they weren’t), I’m just not sure exactly how important, on the grand scheme of things or in relation to each other or various alternatives. I think I’m starting to appreciate history and traditions more, and possibly embrace a more ‘normal’ idea of church a bit (though still not too much). I suppose what I am wrestling with is the theological (though that at its most basic level!) and the practical out workings of it all.

I have the feeling that this will prove to be a short and slightly mixed up intro to a subject that keeps coming up…

Hello world!

so I gave in and got myself a blog….

not so much because I think I have much to offer, more because a good friend said they didn’t reckon I could keep one going. Suppose you could call me petty…

and for those curious about the name, reuben was taken (shocked!!!)

so:

messy: unashamedly nicked from messy spirituality, sums up how I feel on this journey most the time!

musing: n.

1. Contemplation; meditation.

2. A product of contemplation; a thought.

suppose time will tell whether my friend was right or not…